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Archive for February 19th, 2012

Little People Invade Hogwarts

Chapter 1: The Little People Invade Hogwarts

Through a rift between dimensions, Adolf Hitler has made contact with an evil dwarf Warlord, who calls himself Shadow Hitler and together they trade evil plots and more as they each conquer their respective dimensions. EVIL FREAKING DWARVES invade Hogwarts Wizard academy on a rainy night in the spring of 1941.

The characters begin as 0 level first year students at Hogwarts Magical School during the “London Blitz” era of World War 2, the fall semester of 1940. Across the channel, France has capitulated and for months German Guns have been bristling along the French coast, aimed directly at England, and Hogwarts stands between the cannons and London.

By night, the students fight the endless drones of planes sent to fire bomb the cities, and the students learn their magic in the heat of battle, flying brooms and spells against fighters and bombers. By day, the students weave between a classroom schedule meant to raise their skills and ability scores in the areas that matter to them.

This story takes place before any Tom Riddles or Voldemorts, and the school’s head master is none other than Merlin, raised from his slumber to defend England in her time of need. The houses are arcehtypal: Gryffindor is for fighting and good, Slytherin is sneaky and evil, Hufflepuff are steadfast and loyal, and Raven Claw are mysterious and weird. There are six classes each based on an ability score and the skills associated with that score. In addition, each character has access to cantrips, but must roll arcana checks to cast the spells correctly. Hijinks ensue.

Meanwhile…

Shadow Hitler the Eightht Dwarf

Chapter 2: Shadow Hitler the Eighth Dwarf

In another dimension dwarven submarines and dive bombers assault Neverwinter led by the dwarven warlord Shadow Hitler. The city falls quickly, and becomes the Fantasy version of Paris, and also Shadow Hitler’s new home base, where he erects an iron pyramid in one corner of the ruined city. It’s symbol is the “Bearded Swass”

The night of the invasion (during first year finals) in the middle of it the players are alternate-dimensionized into fantasy version of themselves, as first level class and race of their choice. (They retain use of one favorite cantrip.) They need to find a way back to their own world, and not get caught by the EVIL FREAKING DWARVES who have conquered the land led by Shadow Hitler the Dwarf Warlord.

The strangers to the world need some sort of cover or concealment. Hearing the sounds of battle ahead, they find a group of humans and orcs that fought to the death over a wagon. It is full of costumes and musical instruments, and a gold filigree scroll entitling the bearers of the scroll to compete in the bardic band olympics, to be held in Neverwinter jewel of the north and judged by Shadow Hitler himself.

Yes, the players become rock band double agents of the EVIL FREAKING DWARVES.

As Shadow Hitler prepares a cleansing war against the humanoid monsterland gathering under War Duke Stalin’s iron fist to the north and east of Neverwinter, he also looks longingly to the civilized southlands, ripe for the plucking.

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